MoonRaiser

This is a transcription of a bit done by Mark and Brian a few years back. It is featured on their charity C.D., Little Drummer Boys. They just re-played it the other day and brought it to memory. Very Christmas-y and funny!!! One of my favorites:

Mark: Well, many of you probably remember the Rudolph situation where he discovered the land of the misfit toys in the Rudolph Christmas special, he discovers the land of the misfit toys. And, last year we spoke with King MoonRaiser, the king of the island of misfit toys, who was hoping for some of our listeners to adopt some of the misfit toys and ease overcrowding on the island, 'cause it's really kinda getting a little bit space challenged. Well, we thought we'd see how that went. So, with us once again with us is King MoonRaiser. Good morning, King MoonRaiser.

(Floof floof, floof floof)

Mark: He's flying in...

(floof floof)

King MoonRaiser: I am King MoonRaiser, king of the island of misfit toys.

Mark: Good Morning

King MoonRaiser: Good morning, I'm a flying lion.

Mark: Yes, you are. Now, what is the situation on the island of misfit toys?

King MoonRaiser: Worse than ever, I'm afraid, not that you'd care

Mark: Of course we care

King MoonRaiser: Not only did none of your listeners not adopt any of our reject toys, but during the past year even more loser toys have flocked to my island looking for a free ride.

Mark: Well, would you like to run down some of the toys, just in case our listeners might be interested in adopting one of them?

King MoonRaiser: Yes, it would help a bit.

Mark: OK

King MoonRaiser: Here is a list of just a few of the toys I would really love to get rid of:
Barbie's Malibu Outhouse. Misfit toy.
Nicotine Patch Kids.
Tic Tac Camel-Toe.
Baby Got Backgammon. Misfit toy.
Honkey Kong. Misfit toy.
Tickle Me L. Ron Hubbard. Misfit toy.
Crucifixionary.

Mark: Fly around some, King.

(Floof floof)

King MoonRaiser: I'm a flying lion, I'm the King of the misfit toys.

Mark: Right.

King MoonRaiser: Crucifixionary.
Mr. Potato Crotch.
Mouse Crap. Misfit toy.

Mark: Guess it would be

King MoonRaiser: My First Crystal Meth Lab. Misfit toy.
John Candy Land.
Michelob Lite Brite.
G. I. Joe Momma.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Gallaghers.
Hasbro's Do It Yourself Circumcision Kit. Misfit toy.
And, finally, Poop Chutes and Ladders.

(Floof floof)

King MoonRaiser: Flying, around flying...

Mark: Allright, yeah, well, listen...

King MoonRaiser: These are just some of the toys I want to shove out the screen door and don't let it hit you in the ass. Get off my island, you misfit toys! Please someone, come and rescue them.

Mark: Well, we understand it is an overcrowded situation there. We'll do our best to see that listeners come and adopt some of those misfit toys.

King MoonRaiser: I'll be flying out now to go back to my island.

(Floof floof, floof floof)

Mark: See ya, King MoonRaiser!

(Floof floof, floof floof)

Mark: Bye bye!

(Floof floof, floof floof)

Mark: Say good bye to King MoonRaiser, everybody.

(Floof floof, floof floof)

Mark: King of the island of misfit toys.

(Floof floof, floof floof)

King MoonRaiser: Is that your car down there?

Mark: No, why, what are you going to do?

(Grunt)
(Floof floof, floof floof, floof floof, floof floof)